I have been seeing a sponsored link on my Facebook page from an art auction company called Paddle 8. I was intrigued and checked out their site. It was full of contemporary art one could bid for online. Sort of like a high end artsy ebay.
However upon further investigation I was amazed at how ugly and ridiculous the art was. Seriously. Yet, all of this rubbish was being praised and described in such lofty attributes, I for a moment thought the Onion had taken of Paddle 8.
Example on one piece of ‘art’, the description reads “Succo’s contemporary take on abstraction is grounded in a desire to see patterns emerge through repeated gestural activity. Working in a limited, nearly monochromatic palette, the trace of the artist’s hand becomes the principal agent of expression. Here, in “UNTITLED [RB#1]” cyclical flourishes dance over an icy, blue-grey surface of lacquer and oil paint.” WTF does that even mean? Either way, the starting price is….wait for it……$9,000.00! LOLOLOL
Here is what their trying to pawn off as art. (and they will probably succeed.)
This actually looks like my drop cloth.
Anyway, I thought I would try an experiment and submit a piece of my abstract art for consideration to be auctioned off at Paddle 8.
I submitted with a lofty description of how I use found medium to convey a sense of sustainability in the pieces. I incorporate acrylic, oil, gold leaf and objects for a textured and layered visage. I thought this description conveyed the proper pretentiousness for my experiment.
However, since I’m not a ‘listed’ artist, I was rejected with a curt, but polite email.
For a moment I was slightly hurt, but then again, I realized the rejection might possibly be a compliment.
Anyway, I thought I would see if my readers could tell the difference between which one I submitted and which ones are actually up for sale at this very moment for thousands of dollars.
Here goes. Which of these four paintings are being sold on Paddle 8 for thousands of dollars and which one is hanging in my bathroom.
Here are the links to see if you answered correctly.
A. “Untitled” 2013
B. “Untitled” 2014
C. “Never Lost” 2014
D. “Bright and Contemporary” 2014